For years working in the corporate life, I was daunted by the fact that I was not true to myself- the fact that I was no living my life as what I was meant to live as. It haunts me and made me develop resentment for my job, sometimes, resentment for myself.
Many people can relate to this feeling- I know because from my traffic report, a number of people found this blog while looking topics like should they quit their jobs for inner happiness, persue their passion or just go travelling and see the world. I have many corporately successful friends- many who are stuck in high paying jobs, wanted badly to get out but can’t because of commitment and low risk appetite.
Exactly, what it is that I love? The times when I sat down honestly to think about it, I cannot imagine how doing what I love could earn me a good living. Yes, successful new age gurus preach it- that they followed their dreams, hit a couple of big roadblocks and finally made it. Today, they’re all successful for you to see. They encourage us to follow their footsteps.
I’ve had many interest and dreams that I want to turn into a full time living. If I am honest with myself and you, I would have to admit that sometimes, these ideas are better off where they are- in my dreams. They’re just not workable.
But the mind would refuse to let it go. So, you’ll probably find yourself googling the net to look for inspiration for others who’ve been there or done that. You read about their stories, get motivated, sit down and write down your plans….then, what happens?
The next day, you decide that it’s just not viable. Nah, you’ll probably be broke like a starving artist following your dreams. And then, you go on with your life, feeling discontented and within a couple of weeks, the resentment builts up again. And the entire process repeats itself all over again.
Face it, do it and get the demons out of your system once and for all?
Only if you dare and have the financial means to do so- ie you can still feed yourself, your family and pay the bills if things does not work out. Some dreams just refuse to die until they’re either: realized or implemented.
The adrenaline that kicks in when your back’s up against the wall- it’s either sink or swim had propelled some people to great success. For some, to bankruptcy and having to live off the streets and on welfare- these are what you often do not see. But as much as I do not want to douse your inner fire- this is the reality.
So my advice, if you want to take risk and leap into the unknown, take only calculated risk especially if it is not only your life’s at stake but those of your loved ones. You have to have enough money to put aside that helps pay the bills, insurance and living expenses.
This gives you a peace of mind. Peace of mind is important for you to be able to focus well at what you’re doing. I know I write better posts and are inspired because I need not worry about where my next’s meal is coming from.
I know people who must run on adrenaline high in order to feel excited about living- please my friend, it is not healthy in the long run.
Been there, done that
Finally after years of being tormented by thoughts that I am not living the life I want, I’ve decided to follow my dreams. To silence the persistent buggings of the heart. But I did that after accumulating enough savings to consistently pay my bills, credit card and insurance.
Was it worth it?
To be absolutely honest, yes. It was worth it. Because I discovered the truth and learn more about myself in the process. The experience made me more mature and grown up- to the realities of the world. And I turned my back from the corporate world- at least for now.
If I never quit my previous job, the thought that I should be someone else, doing something else will constantly haunt me both day and night- they even give me nightmare sometimes! Having thoughts like this brings in inner resentment- sometimes, you may even start resenting those around you for making you feel stuck or offering well-meaning advise like ‘just work and earn a living- everyone else does’. It’s a waste of a lot of time and your happiness scale to live life like this.
I leaped into the unknown, and yes, eventually I did become someone else. I admit I am more financially poorer than I was last time (that explains the Adsense ads plastered across my blogs- they’ve really got to pay for themselves now that I can no longer afford its quality hosting).
But if you ask me, I am way off happier than I was in the past. I spent a lot of time after work dabbling and writing for my blogs which I truly love. I watch my visitors increasing and knowing that some have found comfort or solutions that they’ve came to look. This made it all worthwhile.
I let my day job takes care of the worry of having to pay the bills and put food on the table. I took a job that does not exhaust me mentally and physically. And my boss actually let me do what I love as well- doing powerpoint presentations and, yes, building the company’s site, among other things.
And in my off working time, I am able to run my blogs, come up with more posts and remain creative. I pay the price because I choose inner wealth vs outer.
But are you willing to do so as well? The answer lies within you- it will be your decision alone- no one can make that decision for you.